A Surrogate’s Birth
I don’t talk about it often, but I’ve been a surrogate three times. My last journey ended in October 2024. I’m incredibly grateful that I was able to document the birth—well, my birth support person took the photos. Below is my perspective on the birth. The baby’s parents have kindly given me permission to share images of their baby’s face from the birth.
The plan was for a scheduled c-section at 38 weeks. I was looking forward to casually walking into the operating room, but the baby had other plans and decided to make their debut a few hours earlier. I was GBS+ (Group B Strep positive), which meant that if my water broke, I needed to head straight to the labour and delivery ward. Sure enough, around 10 p.m. the night before the scheduled date, my water broke.
For three weeks leading up to the c-section, I had a terrible cough that triggered incontinence and left me wearing Depends 24/7. When I felt leaking without coughing, I was confused at first. In all my previous labours, my water hadn’t broken until it was time to push, so I didn’t know what to expect. But when I soaked through another Depends without a coughing fit, I realized—it was go time.
I called my doula after I started feeling contractions, and we headed to the hospital.
Since I had mentally prepared for a planned c-section, I wasn’t ready to deal with contractions. Holy moly, I was not a fan. The contractions were regular and intense. Once we arrived at triage, it was confirmed that my water had broken, which set everything in motion for the c-section. Thankfully, my OB had started his shift earlier that night, so he was there for the birth. I know how rare it is for people to have their primary care provider at the birth, especially with OBs, so I felt very lucky.
While I was excited to meet the baby and move into postpartum recovery, my nerves kicked in as I waited for the OR. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t panicking slightly—flashbacks of my last experience started creeping in. I’m so grateful that my doula, Sue, was by my side the entire time. Fun fact: Sue has been present at all three of my surrogate births. Having her constant support has been such a gift, and I will forever cherish our bond.
Walking from triage to the OR felt surreal, especially since my last experience involved being rushed on a gurney. I even cracked a joke as I passed the nurses’ station to calm my nerves. Once in the OR, the team explained each step, keeping everything calm and reassuring.
When it was time for the epidural, I was nervous that it wouldn’t work. Thankfully, it did, but it’s always surreal to be awake and present during surgery. Everything went so smoothly—it was incredible. The atmosphere in the OR was lighthearted, with lots of banter that helped ease my nerves.
Oh, remember that persistent cough I had? I tried my best to suppress it during the procedure, and the doctors guided me on when it was safe to cough to avoid complications.
From the time I arrived at the hospital to being wheeled into the postpartum room, the whole process took less than six hours.
Why a Planned C-Section?
Several factors influenced my decision to request a planned c-section this time:
1. Healing from a Previous Trauma: My last birth was a traumatic emergency c-section. This time, I wanted to reclaim the experience and have a more controlled, peaceful birth.
2. Prolapse Repair: I had a rectocele prolapse from five previous births, which was surgically repaired. I didn’t want to risk any complications.
3. Permanent Birth Control: I wanted my tubes removed, as I am very much done having children. Six pregnancies felt like more than enough!
4. Control Over Recovery: This was my first surrogate journey as a single person, and being self-employed, I needed control over my healing and schedule.
I had an amazing OB who respected my wishes and helped make this c-section a truly healing experience.
This was absolutely my last pregnancy. Over the years, I’ve brought six babies into the world—three of my own and three for three wonderful families. Now, I’m ready to embrace the next chapter of my life, discovering who I am without being pregnant or caring for my very young children.
I’m an open book when it comes to surrogacy. If you’re curious—whether as an intended parent or a potential surrogate—please don’t hesitate to reach out. Let’s talk!
